Pauline Reflections 04 - 9th August 2008

PAUL ON MARRIAGE: EPHESIANS 5: 21-33

Faithfulness in Christian marriage until death is becoming more and more challenging and it seems our younger generation dread a life of commitment and would rather take it one day at a time. In these verses Paul establishes a marriage standard with very clear instruction for Christian married couples. Christian marriage is not just a union of the spouses, it is Christian marriage because Christ instituted the sacrament and he is primarily involved in making it work with the co-operation of the spouses. 

Although verse 21 - the idea of wives being subjects or subordinates to their husbands - is very controversial among biblical scholars, this understanding may be in line with the historical origins of scripture reflecting a masculine domination over the feminine. I propose here a spiritual and a pastoral understanding of the term 'subject' or 'subordinate'. It must not be restricted to just the wives being subject to their husbands. My preferred translation is “wives and husbands be subjects to one another.” This implies mutual consideration, mutual submission, and mutual thoughtfulness. It implies an attitude of love towards one another. The last phrase is the climax of the message “out of reverence for Christ”. 

Christ becomes the foundation of marriage and the model that inspires and motivates spouses to be in love and to remain in love. “Wives should be subordinate to their husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is head of his wife just as Christ is head of the Church.” (v. 22-23) The wife should serve her husband in the same spirit as that of the Church’s service to Christ and the husband should care for his wife with the devotion of Christ to his Church. (v. 25-30) This can be fitted into the wider context of the love of Christ for his people inviting us to do the same for “a man can have no greater love than to lay down his life for his friend.” (John 15:13) 

Paul concludes his message by a recourse to the Genesis 2:24 which he quotes almost verbatim in 5:31 “for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh”. This reality is indeed a great mystery as it is in reference to Christ and his Church.

 Prayer

Lord Jesus, bless all married couples; give them the grace to truly understand the meaning of Christian marriage as a sacrament and the courage to accept the challenges of each day with patience, humility, forgiveness and love. Amen